I’m Really a Superstar

Translator: Legge Editor: Legge

That night.

Suddenly, a news article was published on an obscure social media news blog.

"An unnamed famous host of Central TV has gotten into trouble again!"

The content was as follows: "According to an unidentified insider, an unnamed famous host won close to 100 times consecutively during the lucky draw segment at Central TV\'s internally organized annual staff party this afternoon. All of the prizes during the draw were won by him and the annual staff party dispersed on unhappy terms eventually!"

At the beginning, this piece of news did not attract much attention because a social media news blog would not be as well publicized as the official media outlets. Furthermore, the news source was not reliable either. But as time passed by, more and more Central TV staff and industry insiders started replying and forwarding this news article, helping to verify the authenticity of it!

The netizens couldn\'t sit still anymore!

"What?"

"Swept up all the prizes?"

"How did they conduct the draw?"

"Surely that can\'t be true?"

"Who the hell could it be?! Who has such heaven-defying luck?"

"Central TV? An unnamed famous host? Got into trouble again? Pfft, you still can\'t link who it is with these three keywords? Is this your first time on the Internet?"

"It\'s definitely Zhang Ye!"

"Pfft, it can\'t be anyone else other than that guy!"

"Yea, only a person like Zhang Ye could stir up such a big commotion!"

"This must be fake news, right?"

"It really happened. I have a friend working at Central TV who participated in the annual staff party. He witnessed the entire thing with his own eyes and described the incident as—way too amazing! Everyone was shocked by it! Everyone, including the Central TV station execs, could only helplessly watch as Zhang Ye emptied the entire inventory of prizes for the annual staff party, taking them away box by box until the very end!"

"What on earth happened?"

"I heard that something happened just before the annual staff party began. The execs of Central TV had meted out a punishment to Zhang Ye because of the crosstalk routine \'I Want to Get on the Spring Festival Gala\' he performed during Beijing TV\'s Spring Festival Gala rehearsal. That nearly prevented him from taking part in the annual staff party!"

"So that\'s what happened!"

"Then with that temperament Zhang Ye has, he must have lost his temper right there!"

"Hahaha, that hot temper of Zhang Ye is what I like most about him!"

"But how did he manage to win everything?"

"Who knows!"

"Who cares how he managed to do that. What\'s really disgraceful is Central TV\'s attitude toward Teacher Zhang! So he had to smack their faces! And make some trouble for them!"

...

At home.

Zhang Ye was grabbing some food for Chenchen. "Hurry up and eat. Stop playing on your phone!"

Chenchen ignored him. "I\'m not hungry."

"If you don\'t eat, I\'ll take it back," Zhang Ye said with a serious face.

Chenchen could only pout and used her chopsticks to take a few token mouthfuls of food. Through all that, her eyes were staring fixedly at the screen of her new cell phone.

It was also about the same for the three sisters who were seated at the dining table as they couldn\'t take their hands off their new cell phones.

At this moment, a phone call came in.

Zhang Ye looked at the caller ID and saw that it was from Hu Fei. He stood up and walked away, standing closer to the kitchen where he answered the call with a laugh and said: "Brother Hu, you\'re looking for me?"

Hu Fei immediately said: "You clashed with Central TV again?"

"Hai." Zhang Ye said: "You\'re really well-informed with your sources."

Hu Fei said: "How am I well-informed? The news has already spread all over the Internet. It\'s just that I\'m not sure whether this news is fake, but hearing you say it this way, I\'ll assume that it is real? You\'ve really emptied the entire prize rack at the annual staff party?"

Zhang Ye laughed embarrassed. "More or less."

Hu Fei asked: "How much is more or less?"

Zhang Ye paused, then answered: "That means that I didn\'t leave anything behind for them."

Hu Fei: "…"

"Ha," Zhang Ye laughed.

Hu Fei hesitated for a moment before suddenly saying with a tinge of apology: "Was it because of us that Central TV decided to mete out the punishments on you? If we knew that it would affect you so greatly, we wouldn\'t have asked you to come onto our Beijing TV Spring Festival Gala and brought you all this trouble."

"It has nothing to do with you all." Zhang Ye smiled and remarked: "When has there ever been a day that I didn\'t fight with them? Even if it weren\'t over the Spring Festival Gala issue, I would still be fighting with them over some other thing. It\'s unavoidable, so if they want to fight, I will take them head on. Why should I be afraid of them?"

Upon hearing that, Hu Fei subsided into helpless laughter. "You\'re an artist, writer, and the most popular TV show director in the country right now. Why are you always talking about fighting? I don\'t think you will ever change your ways in this lifetime."

Zhang Ye sardonically replied: "I\'m just a bit open-minded about this. I can never walk the path of those refined and elite people. I have always been this vindictive—unwind my bicycle\'s chain and I\'ll crush your bicycle in return. Throw dirty water at my house and I\'ll make sure to spread dog shit all over your house\'s windows! Ha, you should stop criticizing already since you\'ve known me for such a long time. This is how I will be for my entire life since I wasn\'t born to live in the upper class."

Hu Fei shook his head and laughed. "I really don\'t know what to say. But thinking about it, Little Zhang, if you change your ways one day and cordially treat everyone with respect, I doubt I could actually accept that! Hahaha! Alright, since you\'re fine, I feel at ease now. It\'s fine as long as our side did not cause you too much trouble. Remember to quickly get the crosstalk routine ready for the Spring Festival Gala."

"Don\'t worry, there won\'t be a problem." Zhang Ye guaranteed: "A Bite of China\'s broadcast is almost ending, and once I\'ve settled matters regarding it these next few days, I\'ll get started on the crosstalk script. It\'ll definitely be polished to perfection before Beijing TV\'s Spring Festival Gala. That you don\'t have to worry about since me and Old Yao are very professional. I\'ve already informed Director Chang as well."

Hu Fei laughed and said: "I\'m always reassured when you handle things."

Zhang Ye said: "I still have a lot of prizes that I won from the annual staff party with me. Do you want something? Ask Xiao Lu, Dafei, Hou Ge, and the rest if they want some too. I\'ll bring some things over to you guys."

Hu Fei was amused. "Forget it, just keep whatever you won for yourself."

Zhang Ye smirked. "So there\'s something that I can\'t sell even after promoting it?"

Hu Fei smiled and said: "If you insist on making me accept it, I will take it."

Zhang Ye chuckled. "Alright, then please accept it with reluctance."

"Whatever you say!"

"I\'ll get something for Hou Ge, Dafei, and the others as well. Then I\'ll get a courier to send them over to you since I won\'t be going over there for a few days at least."

...

After lunch.

Zhang Ye\'s obsessive-compulsive disorder was kicking in as he felt very uncomfortable just seeing the pile of items. So he simply decided that he would call up all his friends one by one to ask for their addresses, like Grandma Zhang Xia; Chen Guang; Fan Wenli; his old bosses at the online television station; some of his old classmates; his beloved Teacher Su Hongyan at Media College; skit actress Ci Xiufang; Peking University\'s Chinese Department\'s Su Na and some other colleagues; his friends from the Peking University Mathematics Department; Yao Jiancai and his daughter, Yao Mi; and so on. These were all Zhang Ye\'s closer friends to speak of.

When the courier got to his house, Zhang Ye made his cousins help him write down all the addresses and names of the recipients. He was going to send at least one item to each of his friends. Some would receive the cosmetics while others would receive the cell phones. All of them were considered New Year gifts for them! For a lot of friendships, it required people to constantly keep in touch with one another.

Just the consignment forms alone had to be filled in more than 20 times!

It took them more than 20 minutes to fill in everything!

Zhang Ye did not come outside to show himself. He just stayed put in the bedroom and played with Chenchen. All the form filling work was handled by his three cousins since they didn\'t want to take Zhang Ye\'s gifts for nothing.

The courier who came to his house had his jaw drop when he saw the names on the consignment forms!

Damn! Yao…Yao Jiancai?

Damn! Zhang Xia?

Damn! Chen Guang?

Damn! Fan…Fan Wenli?

Damn! Ci…Ci Xiufang?

And holy shit, there\'s even Zhang Yuanqi?!

Every name on the consignment form gave the courier a great shock!

What the fuck!

What the fuck is with this household?

Do their family members all have the exact same names as those celebrities? Or are they trolling? Were those addresses just written randomly by those three girls? Even though that courier was very experienced and knowledgeable, he was still so shocked by this situation that his hands were trembling!

...

When everything was sent out, Zhang Ye began to feel more relaxed.

He had finally managed to gift everything!